Academic Writing Task 2 #14
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write at least 250 words.
Write about the following topic:
Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities.others however say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required.
Discuss both views and gives your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Answer:

In this day and age,everyone is finding possible ways to live healthy.Few people claim that,it is necessary to have extensive sports facilities to enhance the life of the public,whilst other people opposing this saying,some other initiatives has to putforth to upgrade the people?s health.This essay agrees that maximising the number of sports training facilities will help in developing public health.This essay discuss both the views.

It is quite evident that,establishing plenty of sports facilities camps will eventually have a great impact in one?s health.Firstly,it helps the public to utilize the recreational facilities as much as possible.Moreover ,easy accessibility to these training academy really facilitates the professional athletes and others who wants to stay physically and mentally healthy.Forinstance:In developing countries like india,number of recreational facility centres are blooming in order to serve the public.Therefore as a result massive amount of people are benifited by the services rendered by these centres.

However,there are other people stongly disagreeing claiming that some alternative steps could be taken in upgrading the health of the public.Thestatuatory body has to undertake the privatised recreational centres to their domain.But,this is an uphill task for the government to have a such kind of transition.Forexample:Handling the recreational centres without proper funding and maintainance will leave the people despair who are aiming to lead a healthy life.

In conclusion,while there are more benefits are on the way in boosting the public health ,increasing the sports facilities centres are far more better idea than taking other primitive measurements in the wellness of the people.


Comments/Feedback:

Few = very few. is that what you mean? The minority? In the introduction you give your opinion and then say you are going to discuss both views. Is this a logical approach? In the main body you present an argument in favour of sports centres so in fact you deal with the question well// CC – I prefer para 3 to 2 but the unhelpful intro is the deciding factor for me// LR – uneven but just enough strong collocation and appropriate vocabulary to get a good band// G – there are quite a few minor errors (including articles) and Id like a greater range. Going through this with a native speaker or getting feed back from an online teacher you have faith in would be of great benefit// So, Id say: TA – 7// CC – 7 (but close to 6)// LR – 7 (there are elements that deserve 8)// G – 6 (I thought hard about 7)// = 7.0. You should be capable of consistently achieving 7 in Task 2 and possibly 7.5. Please consider working with a 1-1 teacher for a few sessions. Im not sure how much a class would help you.

Leave a Reply

Close Menu